jeffery has a point...

http://www.vimeo.com/20708297


hey everyone this is going to be a short blog but my friend jeffery has a lot of problems...but he is very smart and im only about half way through this video but so far he has a point...why isnt the government making our educational system better? why are people so inhuman sometimes that they push people into corners who then explode and doing things that well lets just say have more consequences than anyone believed would happen? he was expelled from uscl for a threat against this school and you know what? i honestly believe in my heart that this could have been prevented if just one person would have taken the time to see his side of the story.  i am sorry jeffery that i was not there for you...you were always very nice to me and i guess i didnt want to see the signs because personally i know them all to well myself...just because you are different does not mean that you are a bad person. i really wish you would have talked to someone before doing something like this....but now it is done but i swear i will get this video out there.

His words need to get out there. he has a point. he may not have used the best way to get it across but it doesnt mean that what he is saying isnt true.  the government keeps lying about stuff and show you only what they want you to know. thats why our education systems are so horrible...take my old high school for example it was an old bomb shelter in the 60s, there are no windows in the classrooms, all you see are concrete walls...the actual education part is also outdated...i passed through high school with flying colors...i never studied, hardly ever did homework, and yet i graduated at the top of my class...then i get to college and boom. it was like i walked in to arostotles class room or something. ive had professors be arressted for talking to us about the truth...area 51, obamas real plans about the war, bushs idea of the war, but that is besides the point...just watch this video and please feel free to leave comments...i really want his word to get out and i hope and pray that people actually listen to it.

this heart...is for you...

quiet stary nights...
sittin by your side,
listening to you talk...
there is only one boundary we havent crossed...
matters of the heart,
so deep and lovely...
like the color of your eyes...
deep brown, but hollowed and scared...
i carry that same look too,
dont be afraid...
i promise ill save you.

so as if yall couldnt already tell im kinda falling for this guy really fast...we like all of the same music, books, you name it and we both like it :) skateboarding, dubstep, purple, so much...boy you keep amazing me.
so let me lay it down for you...

• my ((feelings)) for you are *HiDD3N* in PLAiN V3iW!
• i wanna be the girl you can be goofy with...
• i wanna be the girl you can tell anything to...
• i wanna be the girl your scared to lose...
• i wanna be the girl you hold hands with in public && not care what anyone else thinks...
• i wanna be the girl on your mind...
• but most of all i wanna be the girl you love <3

so yea... i wish i had the guts to let you see this blog though i know i wont. i never will. im not couragious enough...im not strong enough...im no where near strong enough...so i will silently wait...and hope that one day you will see the truth in my cold heart...and melt me again :)

SOM3 GiRL......

You might just think of me as some girl... but I just want you to know, that I'm the one girl who took one look at you, and fell harder than I ever have in my entire life. -crush quotes

oh that smile...

oh that smirk...

oh that laugh...

the two scars on your chin...

silent like a wren...

the way your hair falls in your eyes...             

makes me feel tied...

boy you make me smile...

brighter than ever...

i need you more than the breath i take...

more than my heart needs a beat...

watching you fly over concrete...

makes me want to fly too,

but only if im beside you...



LOV3 LiK3 WO333333................

those beautiful eyes...

that beautiful smile...

makes me fall harder and harder every day...

no every moment we share together...

my life is soooo complicated...

but you seem to always know how to make me smile...

and make me feel better....

how...?

why...?

what did i ever do to deserve such kindness?

god knows ive never given you, or anyone else a reason to believe in me...

but just maybe...this time...it will work.

not just work, but last.

its a beautiful begining to what could be the rest of our lives...

feel the blood flowing beneath my veins...

its all thats left of my soul...

but with you...

i know that i still haave a chance...

at being saved from this terrible mess...

love me...and i will in return...

love you like your my last breath...

like your my final heart beat a moment before death...

ill cherish you like no other because we understand each other...

simple looks from across the room,

gives me hope to keep going...

to stay strong...

but ill never know...

unless i ask...

which im not sure that i want to know your answer,

what if this is all just a dream?

or a sweet nightmare?

i guess ill never know...

until i reach over and say i love you in this car :)

oh that smiley-happy-danceeeee :)

singing at the top of our lungs...
screaming out our frustration,
but laughing at how horrible we really sound :)

smiling at each other from across the room,
pennies flying everywhere...
lovely music filled moments,
where i forget the pain && simply look at you :)

wondering what will happen next?
skating, no wait flying...
to my safe place,
though it will never be as good as when im finally in your arms :)
 
my life may be hell,
and your face may be heaven,
but i promise when you look back,
i will always be here :)

We are ALL in the gutter, though some of us are looking at the STARZ :)

so tired of their fucking bull shit.
you love me?
please!
like you were ever there when i needed you most...
or like you even cared at all.
quit lying to your self.
you did this not me.
though i have to say, i miss being a kid.
i hated having to grow up so damn fast.
i look at other kids my age and think...
what the fucking hell did they do that i didnt?
made their parents love them?
hell i dont know anymore.
all i know is that as long as their is still blood flowing in these veins,
a heartbeat beneath this chest,
i will not give up nor give into this world.
i will use my last breath to stand back up and go one more round.
and so what if i fail?
im already dead.

the silence....its deafening....

music.
beautiful melodies.
sweeping through the air,
that surrounds you and me.
lovely,
soft,
melodies.
its begining to make me see,
your path to me.
emotions not present.
not gone.
just not visible.
show me the way,
and ill save you.
let the music flow through our veins,
and let it silence our voices.
til all we have left it that soft beating of our hearts.
beating together as one.
passion.
nervous.
startling first touch.
let me in,
i think that we will be okay.
if you just let the music show us the way.

What did you dream about last night?

my nightmares.

Ask me anything

all jacked up....

Floating not wait swimming...
Far far away from everything...
Don't need any air,
No longer will I need you to breath into me,
I will love u til my last breath...
No more breath.
Swimming beside him.
Talking laughing kissing.
All under this warm water,
We can see waves crash above us,
The sky looks ghoastly,
Like were not apart of the world anymore.
Drifting away,
Focus on his smile, his hair, his fingers intertwined with mine.
Just keep swimming you say :)